Hey ppl

Back to blog again..

long time never blog le.. and soon will not able to blog le .. cos my mother is going to cancel the internet connection le.. this few days happen quite alot thing and i am quite tired and stress!! mood swing very often and just think what is wrong with myself lah..but i really glad that Ming Jie is not angry with me le .. than was like 6 days of coldness end .. now is a new problem which i cannot understand.. i am feeling something very strange and i have never felt before.. i felt i have two different personailty and i will change mood suddenly without any thing happen.. i get happy or sad as or when i like it. sorry if i suddenly scold u for nothing.. n level CPA coursework is just next monday and i think i should have prepare le.. i will get my distintion..this year a new leader taking over E13.. and felt a bit very weird cos sis sheevonne have been my leader for like almost 4 years le.. than she need to move on to the adult service under a new cellgroup.. while me still me but the different side of me.. i still in the usher ministry and regularly attend church service and cellgroup.. my prayer life is not stable.. and i now having bible study and is on victorious living..today service is rev dr a.r bernard and he preach about self esteem and value ! quite good ! and i cried when he give a altar call and i did raise my hand but nv go to the front.. cos i am already at the front.. i think i should have paid finish my three month pledge le bah .. still got 3 more month to pay.. i will arise and build and fufill this pledges..school is totally very stress and dont really want to say anything about that.. that all for now.. and will blog if i got the time and can use comp..

take care guyS
god bless...


To LIVE OR TO DIE??

XiongChangingWorld! Sunday, January 28, 2007

hey ppl!!

back in action!!

these few days happen alot of thing..ever since i be a vice-chairman i am so tired and stress!!how i wish to go heaven right now!cos i can't stand this world which is too unbearable.. i felt like i am a problem causer!if this world without me will be even better..

from the school reopen i haven been staying back in school to study or rather prepare myself for N level which will be this year.. left a few month.. i have skip a few jap drum lesson becos of that..i hope uncle beng huat dun scold me or wat!i am sorry uncle beng huat!

next is my classmates are not united as a class.. i am so stress about this matter and will want my class to help one another and to build up the class spirit!another thing is some of them refused to pay the class fund..

next is i have a friendship de problem..
yesterday i wasn't in the mood and while conferencing with ming jie and germaine aka my ah ma.. i suddenly say out a harsh words to ming jie which i shouldn't have say all that! which cos ming jie to hang up the phone..i have message him two time yesterday and he did not reply or watsoeva.. but he sms germaine that he will not go out with us anymore..than today ming jie is like totally ignore me and the others by what i said to him yesterday.. i blamed no one but myself to cos this problem cause by me and i now trying to get in back with them as i feel bad about having him left out.. I AM TRULY SORRY MR HAN MING JIE!! than today while germaine trying to ask him out he gave a lot of excuses like he will be going out with jerome they all which i think it a lie..he is trying to make us believe that he dun need to be with us le.. but i can sense that he is actually got no one go out with .. if not he will not sms me last time ask me if i am free to go out or what.. it make me just feel so bad that when i go white sand with yi hui vivien they all i almost cried out but try to bear with it.. until when we went our separate ways my tears drops and i wipe it off than try not to think about his.. than when i reach home i bathe and was like want to hide in the bed and cry! but i didn't and i on my computer and blog.. while blogging my tear flow down again.. i just dun understand y? i told yi hui that i want to back out instead of him left with no friend to go out with..cos i still got my understanding friend at church who will share my burden with me.. i hope he will join back the group and go out with them to study.. i dun want him to feel that no one is willing to go out with him..hope he will not take it to heart! maybe i must stop thinking and take a break cos everything will be alright for me!once again SORRY MING JIE!! and sorry guys for being unfair to you all..i think maybe this friendship will last till here.. love you guys.. take care..
what i learn from this is that

IT TAKE YEARS TO BUILD ON FRIENDSHIP BUT IT TAKE A SECOND TO DESTROY IT

and last of all...
ALL THE BEST FOR 4T1'07..
this year is the last year we should treasure cos we will be going our separate ways after the N level exam!
TAKE CARE AND GOD BLESS

XiongChangingWorld! Friday, January 12, 2007